Catholic Marriage Preparation Course

As part of getting married in the Catholic Church, my fiance and I had to attend a mandatory marriage preparation course. When I first learned of this, I was a little apprehensive of what exactly this Catholic course might entail. Hearing stories of my parents' experience when they took the same course nearly 30 years ago didn't do much to put me at ease.

Although I was baptized, raised, and confirmed in the Catholic faith, I have never really been an active member of the parish community. I can't even really claim that I am a practicing Catholic. With a hectic work and travel schedule over the past several years, I rarely have the time, or one could argue I rarely MAKE the time, to attend weekly mass in my hometown. (I should point out that I have made the effort to attend mass more frequently as of late!) Needless to say, this marriage preparation course put on by prominent members of the parish community was sounding a lot more like an obligation than a blessing to me.

Before attending our course, Ken and myself had to complete a very detailed assessment/questionnaire about our ideas and values regarding certain topics such as finance, family life, self-esteem, communication, and conflict resolution. Contemplating some of the questions, I really hoped both of our answers would be kept private from the group. Luckily, our interpreted results were handed to us privately and we were able to discuss them as a couple. I found this part of the course very helpful. We were able to see which areas we agreed and disagreed on, and identify areas of opportunity for discussion. It was a great lead in to start the conversation between us about some aspects of marriage we may not have thought about discussing previously.

Throughout the weekend, we heard from a few couples on the various topics we covered. (Finance, intimacy, conflict resolution, etc) Each couple hosted a group discussion, giving real examples from their own marriage. The testimonies were honest, and at times emotional. The couples who hosted workshops shared both the good and the bad. Ken and I really appreciated the couples who volunteered their time to tell their unique and memorable stories during these workshops.

We were also pleasantly surprised to discover that the Catholic teachings throughout this course were quite a bit more liberal than either of us had expected. For example, the current teaching on family planning is to make informed, responsible and loving decisions with your partner. Although natural family planning is strongly encouraged throughout the course, this teaching now supports alternate methods that may arise from making these decisions together. Clearly, there are a number of scenarios (primarily health reasons) which would require a couple to make some tough decisions. We were glad to hear that any decision we made using this model would be supported by the Church.

At the beginning the course, we had wondered whether the materials covered would be preparing us for a Catholic marriage as seen through rose coloured glasses. In fact, we found it was quite the opposite. The facilitators did a great job covering a multitude of issues and scenarios that may crop up throughout the course of our future marriage. Overall, we both found the course useful as well as interesting. ~♡~